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Archive for March, 2012

Cinderolda in Print!

Tuesday, March 20th, 2012

Janet Bubbling With Excitement Over The Print Book

Hey kids! In case you missed the memo, Cinderolda is now available in print! Whoo-hooo!

At Createspace:

On Amazon:

Or CLICK HERE to buy on Amazon.

CLICK HERE to buy on Createspace.

People are loving it!

Stay tuned for updates about my next release, Payback, second in the Patriots Series, coming soon!

Things I Learned On Winter Vacation

Tuesday, March 20th, 2012


Frank and I recently returned from two weeks in paradise, celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary. I’d been planning and saving for the trip for two years. The vacation was supposed to be a romantic rekindling of our relationship. What it ended up being was “Frank and Janet’s In Sickness and In Health Tour of Hawaii.” While the trip served its purpose—Frank and I are very rested—it was not what we had expected. At all. While I didn’t get what I wanted, I ended up with some important realizations. Which might turn out eventually to be what I wanted. Right now, I’m not so sure. At any rate, I thought I’d impart my wisdom-through-adversity onto you and maybe spare you future disappointment.

Number One: Leave your expectations at home. Here’s how I pictured our much- anticipated trip to Hawaii: We would fly into Maui. Frank and I would buy each other leis, we’d do a bit of food shopping, drive to the condo and unpack. We’d throw on our swimsuits, jump into the blissfully warm ocean, then watch the sunset from our lanai over mai-tais. For the following 13 days, we’d have magical romantic walks on the beach; I’d learn to surf and kayak; we’d snorkel; I’d swim in the ocean daily and we’d go out for magical romantic dinners. I envisioned Hawaiian music softly playing in the background while Frank and I gazed at each other lovingly, and celebrated our 24-year relationship. As you’ve probably guessed by now, that’s not what happened.

The night before we left, Frank’s throat began to tickle. By morning, it was sore and he was sick. Earlier that morning, I’d had a Travel Anxiety Attack. In my half-awake state, I tortured myself with all the worst-case scenarios that would prevent us from going on our overly expensive, prepaid, non-refundable vacation. I was so freaked out, I got sick. Sick to the point where I will not provide details. Somehow I recovered, breezed to the airport and onto the plane. While I still felt sick, I felt more stupid than anything for worrying about something so dumb as a routine plane flight.

Right as we were about to land, Frank developed new symptoms of his illness and my motion sickness really kicked in. We had to stay an extra hour in the airport, just to stabilize enough so we could drive. Took us all day to shop and unload, and I missed the sunset. Frank had soda crackers and white rice for dinner. I ate two bites of food and pushed my plate away. We finally gave up and went to bed. Next day, Frank woke up sicker. So I took myself on long, unromantic walks on the beach, went shopping and swimming alone, and cooked and cleaned while Frank slept. For 9 days. Finally, over the last four days, he got better and we snorkeled a couple times. But as for my romantic walks on the beach, even when Frank got better, I couldn’t get him to walk with me due to his aversion of walking in sand. Finally, he agreed on our second to last day there. We got down the beach and it started raining. Hard. Then the wind kicked up and I froze. Swearing, I stomped off the beach and threw out all ideas of magical romantic walks. This was the point where I gave up on the vacation. It wasn’t what I had anticipated, it wasn’t what I had wanted, and I felt cheated and stupid for spending all this money to fly three thousand miles to be disappointed.

Thankfully, I’m in therapy and have tools to deal with adverse situations. Once back in the condo, I finally realized I’d loaded out this vacation with so many expectations, there was no way they could have been met. Even if Frank hadn’t been sick, I would have come away disappointed. I’ve been with the guy for 24 years, I know he hates walking in sand. Yet I threw out all previous knowledge and was disappointed he didn’t turn into a romance novel hero once we hit the shores of Hawaii. I finally realized I’d had a good time. While we spent most of the vacation in the condo, the view from our room was astounding. 270 degree views of the ocean, Molokai and Lanai. Whales cavorted off our balcony, giant sea turtles swam below us, and the sunsets were spectacular. We listened to Hawaiian music, I read five books, and we had nice long talks about our lives and planned for our future. The vacation was fine. My expectations and I had been the problem. Like I told Frank, the trip would have been perfect if I hadn’t been on it.

Number Two: Vacations always cost more than you think. The $500 economy car I’d reserved from Thrifty was “unavailable” when I arrived. I was so sick—and worried about Frank—that I fell prey to the evil rental clerk, an innocuous-looking woman named Connie, who talked me into upgrading to a mid-sized car, the cheapest one with a trunk. $935 later, I felt so screwed, I expected a second date and flowers.

Number Three: If the locals give advice, take it. The warnings in Hawaii are everywhere: White people are advised to wear buckets of sunscreen AND stay out of the sun from 11AM to 2 PM because of the high UV index due to the proximity to the Equator. Everyday, a new white family would appear below us on the beach at 9 or 10AM. After an hour, they turned pink. After two hours, they were red. Oblivious, they stayed on the beach ALL DAY, even during the “Burning Rays of Death” midday. We never saw the same family twice.

I had six more nuggets of advice that don’t fit in this column. But since no one listens to sound advice—especially me—I don’t think you’re missing much.

©2012, Janet Periat

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